Captain Covid Rounds the Bend

President Trump today learned the hard way that dead men – and dead women too – vote early and often. On his way out, the President lost his bid for re-election despite the great job he and his administration did in combating the coronavirus pandemic.

Just look at the statistics. As of November 7, the United States has recorded more than 237,000 deaths from the Covid-19 virus. More than 9,830,000 cases have been reported, one million in Texas alone. For the third straight day, one thousand people a day have died in the U.S. Some numbers, huh! Great some would say, and we know who he is.

While he was on the campaign trail, Captain Covid told his mask-less supporters at rallies, described by some as super-spreader events, that the U.S. had rounded the turn. A vaccine was on the horizon, a result of Captain Covid’s Operation Warp Speed. Warp or warped is not a word Captain Covid’s critics would object to.

In the event any of his supporters got infected at a super-spreader rally, Captain Covid advised them that they could get over the virus. He did. Not all Americans can get experimental therapeutics like the Captain, many of us have lost our medical insurance along with our jobs as a result of the pandemic. But one day we will all have great insurance, much better insurance than Obamacare. Captain Covid promised. He just didn’t say when.

Hey, even his chief of staff tested positive – on Wednesday, the day after the election. Mark Meadows asked the White House staff not to tell anyone that he had tested positive, but someone leaked, couldn’t resist apparently. A secret isn’t any fun unless it’s shared. Five other White House staffers and a campaign official also tested positive. Meadows is one of the White House officials who encouraged Captain Covid to downplay the disease, treat the pandemic like a localized threat in Democratic leaning states. We know what color they are – Baloo.

The pandemic is not the only thing raging in the White House. Before he left for the golf course, Captain Covid’s staff prepared a statement, a reaction to Joe Biden’s victory. The captain accused Biden of falsely posing as a winner. Everyone knows that Captain Covid is the only winner in America. Sleepy Joe is a LOSER. Captain Covid will get to the bottom of this fraudulent election on Monday, in the courts, where Captain Covid will prove that Biden won with illegal votes.

Who voted illegally? The dead people? Let’s look.

During exit interviews, pollsters learned that most voters were more concerned about the economy than the pandemic. They are frankly sick of the pandemic; they told the pollsters. But, according to the Washington Post, 25-million people in America are on unemployment aid due to the economic shutdown. What caused the economic shutdown? Most would say the pandemic.

The dead people may not have filled out provisional ballots, write-in ballots, absentee ballots or even pulled the lever in a voting booth, but their presence was felt by many who voted – and a record number of Americans voted in the presidential election. Many used new voting techniques because of the pandemic.

Legal? You bet it is. Many voters are haunted by fear – fear of death, illness, medical costs, and the loss of: jobs, medical insurance, their homes, and educational opportunities for their children now taught on-line at home because of the pandemic. Many Americans have lost hope.

The new guy, Joe Biden, the president – elect, has promised to announce plans to fight the pandemic early next week. The fight will not be easy. We will keep an eye on the battle and any proposed changes to medical care, prohibitively expensive now. Can it be fixed? Let us hope so.

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